i lost my juice — april mini reviews; shadow and bone, thrillers, mangas and a cute love story

Hello my dudies. You’ve seen the title. Things are not going so well. It’s been a few weeks (months?) since I’ve written a review or a reflection that I actually like. It’s official, I’ve lost my juice. It was hard in the beginning. I tried writing what I was thinking but once it was laid out black on white on my laptop screen, I hated it. I hated it so much that I closed everything without saving it and turned off my computer. Yes, what a cute love-hate relationship. I love reading, I love sharing my thoughts and opinions, but I’ve crossed a bridge where my confidence in what I write just crumbled. There I said it. I’m not confident anymore to share my point of view and my words. I don’t want to sound stupid, I don’t want to talk about a book that I liked because I’m scared I won’t honour it enough, I won’t say exactly what I felt. Putting words on feelings have always been complicated to me, and writing reviews actually helped me with this issue, but now I feel like I’m at a dead end. I can’t sit on my desk and just write a perfect little review anymore. I honestly hope that it’s just a phase, that I will find my writing juice back.

Don’t worry though, I’ve been reading a lot. And after accepting the fact that trying to write a review that I won’t like in the end is not a solution, I’ve just kept on my reading pace and actually enjoyed my time much more. No worries about when I have to post the review, no worries if I forget to mention one thing or another. I’ve been also accepting the fact that, doing my studies at the same time, my brain just can’t hold that much information at a time. So I forget about some part of the books I’ve read not so long ago, and it’s okay. The priority will always be my studies and university, so I prefer memorising lectures and notes than stressing about memorising what I want to say in a book review. I deeply respect everyone who’s able to juggle between university and book blogs/accounts. To you all, I still read all the things you do because even if I currently can’t do it myself, I enjoy your work and always will.

Now that the ranting part is over. Let me tell you about this idea I had. Oh, it’s not a breakthrough one don’t get too excited. I’ve been noticing how little care I have when I review the books I’m reading on goodreads/thestorygraph (what do you mean we’re not friends there yet? what are you waiting for!). I literally throw words next to one another and call it a day. I try to summarise what I liked and what’s the book about (because I tend to quickly forget about it) and most importantly, I try to describe what I felt reading it. Because despite everything said, a book review will remain subjective (at least for fiction). The feelings I have when I read a book is the most important part of my reading journey. I liked it if I felt it.

Before starting, I’d like to address what’s happening in the world right now. Things can change now of we decide to speak up and use our social media and platforms to point out the injustice, monstrosity and governmental issues going on in India and Palestine. You can educate yourself on what’s happening here. I’m very active on twitter and instagram to light up the horrible genocide that is going on in Palestine right now, orchestrated by Israel toward innocent civilians, men, women and children. You can help and support India by donating here.

So here are the books and mangas I’ve read in April 2021. I call this section “mini reviews”, because I’ll try to tell you what the books are about and my opinion without doing endless posts that I’ll hate in the end. Here you go my sweet little butterflies! ( I knew I actually made a whole review about this first book but I don’t even remember what I wrote. I was still in this phase where I couldn’t accept the fact that I lost my reviewing juice, so let me give you a brief opinion again)

I always have mixed feelings when I read a Stephen King book. I know that this author is at some point problematic, let’s address it, his use of the n-word in some of his books is totally inappropriate. Yet, I keep reading his book and I don’t know if I should. I enjoyed this one until the end, until he fucked everything up AGAIN. This story follows a young boy who learns how to deal with his power, he can see dead people, that have the mysterious ability to tell the truth and only the truth. But the true horror resides in the end, in the limit of the human sanity (again). It wasn’t the best book I’ve ever read but it’s a short one, and King’s writing is simple now (yes now, his old books were much more detailed in my opinion).

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Who never heard of the famous grisha trilogy who recently got a tv show adaptation? Well, I fell in the bandwagon because I was interested in the show but my avid reading soul couldn’t accept the fact that a book adaptation was released without me heaving read the story yet. So I read it. I actually binged it. Not that it’s addicted, well a little bit I’m not going to lie. Alina is an interesting character, a young woman who suddenly becomes a god-like figure to people. She understands quickly who she has to fight against and for who. Even though the romance is a bit ridiculous in this story, the main plot of Alina saving her country is pretty well done. It’s not that full of actions and events but it’s not that bad and I was surprised about it. Alina could have been a little bit more implicated in the main quest of the book but anyways. I kept reading…

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My goodness this book made me eye-roll so bad. This book is not better or worse than the first one, just infuriating. Maybe because I don’t like cocky boys, they make me cringe, and Sankta Alina knows how much I cringed reading this one. Alina grows up and becomes much more mature in this book, which is quite complicated when she’s surrounded by men deciding who’s battling against each other to win the award of who’s guilt tripping Alina the most. Alina yet stays determined and the first person point of view enforce how much Alina thinks about everything. She’s not letting anyone decide in her place anymore. The introduction of new characters was welcomed, it was starting to get boring and the quest is just a repetition of the first one in the previous book. I’m glad they’re quick reads though.

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I’ve seen this book on many platform and the cover just attracted me so much I decided to buy it. Don’t you love how you’re starting a book you suddenly stop reading, stare at a random spot in the room and think “what the fuck am I actually reading”? Well, this happened to me in the beginning of the book. Was it because I couldn’t focus or because I’m not familiar with the Scottish writing style? Either way, I’ve enjoyed this thriller. It made me feel uncomfortable reading it, following Lauren, a little girl, and her father in their lives, taking place in a claustrophobic little village where appearances and disappearances both generate creepy feelings. I’ve never read such a book, the writing style, the ambiance. It may sound stupid, but reading this book felt like having moist and sticky hands after a long walk in a forest.

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You can’t even imagine the happiness and giddiness I felt while reading this book. The writing style was light and the reference to the music from Fine Young Cannibals is just so good! It sets the mood of the story completely and my heart is warm with love when I hear it now. This is an enemies to lovers supplemented by a fake dating plot, isn’t it splendid? Following Scottie and Irene was a delight and their journey toward healing from toxic relationships, from taking the time to find themselves back, learn how to be their own person. nobody is born as they are now, they grow, they make mistakes, they apologise, they learn. and high school is known to be a shitty period right? but it’s also the perfect period to find the right people to be around you. Scottie and Irene are both very different but so at the same time very relatable characters. it feels good to have a book that tells a love story between two lovely teenagers. internalised homophobia is discussed, and make the characters grow. The characters” families were also very present, which added this comforting feeling when reading this book.

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No I didn’t just read the first volume. I’ve read the whole story. I actually watched the first 3 seasons of the anime and read as far as I’ve watched it, but never had the guts to keep going (and honestly, waiting every week for a chapter is such a bummer). I have a LOT of thoughts concerning this freaking manga but let’s just say that it’s quite a good story. I’ve grown attached to the characters, which is one big part of why the manga is also well loved. Anyone following this manga knows that some leaked were out recently, about an additional 9 pages by the mangaka. I daily hope that it’s not true because this would ruin the manga entirely. Let’s just say that the ending with the main girl having to absolutely finish with someone is out-dated. If you’ve been following it, let’s talk!

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Chainsaw Man is a manga that I guess will gain in popularity when the anime will be released. I’m familiar with the author since I’ve also read “Fire Punch”, which I recommend vividly if you like completely insane stories. Chainsaw Man is not less crazy but it’s even better than the one previously mentioned, following Denji, a poor young boy doing multiple jobs to survive, who gained a devil power after being left for dead. He’s then recruited to fight other devils that are threatening the well being of the civilians, and etc. I’m not good at ‘synospying’ but you got the overview. Warnings for violence and graphic scenes, it’s quite bloody and pornographic.

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Well, this is a long post but it feels liberating to just throw some words I’ve had in my head for so long. I hope you liked it. I’m not the best at describing what I feel and my opinions, but I’m curious about everyone’s. If you’ve read any of these books, let me know what’s your thoughts about it, if you liked it or hated it. And if you don’t know any of them, let me know which one you’re the most interested in.

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Love you, Sarah 🌷